Did you know it's possible to have perfect action and still have wrong motives?
Wow, I've been hit hard by that realization this week. For several years now I've been in the process of discovering how to operate in the Adam Process. I've learned how to ask questions, how to "draw" from people, and how to coach them to another level of development. However, this week for the first time I think I've finally come face to face with the fact that often my motives have been wrong. It's the challenge of being a change addict. You become so addicted to change and seeing change in other people... that you forget about the people. The change becomes your goal, you become so focused on seeing the product change that you forget about the people along the way.
It's a hard thing to realize that you've taught people what to do, but you've never bothered to really slow down and help them discover why to do. I get in such a hurry trying to yield greater results from my team, to get further down the road, all the while sacrificing their development for the sake of their development. Yes I meant to type that twice. Because I had figured out in my mind where they needed to be and what they needed to be doing then everything I did was to manipulate them to be where I wanted them to be so that they could change. It did yield change, but the problem is I've now positioned myself to where those same people now have to have me there to change. Obviously that's not 100% true, but I have established a system that depends on me for continuous growth and development.
Basically I set myself up as God and Holy Ghost speaking into their life without even realize that that is what I was doing. I failed to teach them how to grow and change for themselves and instead created a dependency on me to interpret their thoughts, actions, and feelings. Instead of me allowing them to learn to sort through their own development, I became a "demi-god" that sorted through them for them. Yes it hurt bad to realize this, and now begins the long journey of de-positioning myself so that they can now discover how to learn on their own.
It's amazing how we go from one glory of revelation to another. How we start by a mental ascent and even a strong "understanding" of the strategies and techniques, but it takes running into the fullness of the revelation to understand that you aren't even close to having the right heart and actually using your strengths effectively.
Here's to long fun journeys!
Ken
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Tuesday, July 08, 2008
Freezing up!
As I write this I'm in a condo house at the beach. Now normally this is supposed to be a fun experience and extremely relaxing... and so far it has been... the only problem is that our A/C is out. As I sit and type this I'm sweating profusely. It's 82 degrees in the house. Here's what is so strange though... it's because the A/C is frozen. How is it that something supposed to get me cool is making me hot by literally freezing over?
And your mind is racing... what in the world does this have to do with me?
Everything. Did you know that inside of you is everything you need to be able to dramatically cool off your world? God has put a gift inside of you to be able to pour refreshing into the world around you... here's the problem ... you're frozen up. At least many of us are. We are so focused on ourselves... the components that keep us cool that we have locked ourselves down. I have seen ministers who became so consumed with what God was doing inside of them that they refused to go "OUT"! I'm glad that you have the coldest and most refreshing revelation inside of you, I'm excited that you are a terrific machine that can cool almost anything... but let me tell you... if you don't release the air out of yourself you will freeze up! The problem is a lack of freon.
Many of us have great revelation, great wisdom, and great ideas... but it's the ability to release the revelation without freezing up. Freezing up is not just freezing up in your message delivery. It's freezing up because you don't know how to release to other people what is on the inside of you. Maybe you don't trust people, maybe you don't know how to activate them, and maybe you think you are addressing them but you aren't seeing results. Anything that exists for itself will eventually die. If you are not existing for other people to not only receive nourishment, but also to receive empowerment then you are headed toward freezing up. If you get bogged down inside yourself and you are not passing off the responsibility inside of you then you are freezing up. And before long you will exist only for yourself and will be completely locked down.
So here's the goal. GET FREE-ON. Get free of your dependency on yourself... learn to trust your team. Get free of your paranoia and arrogance that only you can do great things... Get free of your internal focus and focus on how to best deliver what's inside of you to other people... both refreshment and also empowerment. Activate your team, let go of your grip on all the power, and TRUST GOD... and other people!
And your mind is racing... what in the world does this have to do with me?
Everything. Did you know that inside of you is everything you need to be able to dramatically cool off your world? God has put a gift inside of you to be able to pour refreshing into the world around you... here's the problem ... you're frozen up. At least many of us are. We are so focused on ourselves... the components that keep us cool that we have locked ourselves down. I have seen ministers who became so consumed with what God was doing inside of them that they refused to go "OUT"! I'm glad that you have the coldest and most refreshing revelation inside of you, I'm excited that you are a terrific machine that can cool almost anything... but let me tell you... if you don't release the air out of yourself you will freeze up! The problem is a lack of freon.
Many of us have great revelation, great wisdom, and great ideas... but it's the ability to release the revelation without freezing up. Freezing up is not just freezing up in your message delivery. It's freezing up because you don't know how to release to other people what is on the inside of you. Maybe you don't trust people, maybe you don't know how to activate them, and maybe you think you are addressing them but you aren't seeing results. Anything that exists for itself will eventually die. If you are not existing for other people to not only receive nourishment, but also to receive empowerment then you are headed toward freezing up. If you get bogged down inside yourself and you are not passing off the responsibility inside of you then you are freezing up. And before long you will exist only for yourself and will be completely locked down.
So here's the goal. GET FREE-ON. Get free of your dependency on yourself... learn to trust your team. Get free of your paranoia and arrogance that only you can do great things... Get free of your internal focus and focus on how to best deliver what's inside of you to other people... both refreshment and also empowerment. Activate your team, let go of your grip on all the power, and TRUST GOD... and other people!
Monday, July 07, 2008
Performance vs Leadership
Recently, I've been evaluating what makes a great leader. I think for years I have subtly had a perception that great leaders are people who get the job done. They are able to be QB and make the decisions that get the ball into the right person's hand at the right time to score the touchdown. But the more I work pursue leadership the more I find out the subtle problems that accompany this mindset. Without a doubt there are fundamentals that we should all be able to accomplish, but being a great QB doesn't make me a terrific leader.
Think about those leaders that you see as great... there's our problem. Most of our standard of great leadership is based off of how many people they have following them. Here is what I'm finding though... What is the level of leadership of the people following them? This is quite a challenging question, because if you can't define what leadership is to begin with it can make it quite difficult to assess the level of leadership of the person's followers.
Let's look a little closer. If we have a QB mentality the the ball always has to pass through our hands. Every play is dependent upon us and our ability. Every success becomes our success and every failure becomes our failure.
What I am struggling, straining, and striving to move towards is becoming a coach. See a coach knows all the positions. He knows the fundamentals that make people a success at every position, although he himself may never have played the position "professionally". But it's difficult to move from QB to Coach.
For those few people that have made the transition to coach, the hard part is training assistant coaches. For many of us, we make the initial move to coaching our teams, but we fail to ever build a structure that sets us up to coach coaches instead of just players. IF WE ALWAYS COACH PLAYERS WE ARE REALLY JUST QB'ING FROM THE SIDELINE!!! We must establish a structure that allows us to coach other coaches and develop them to coach players.
Of course recognizing that you need to make them coaches and actually making them coaches are two very different things. You can't just warp yourself to success, you have to move from where you are to where you're going... and that is a blog for another day!
Think about those leaders that you see as great... there's our problem. Most of our standard of great leadership is based off of how many people they have following them. Here is what I'm finding though... What is the level of leadership of the people following them? This is quite a challenging question, because if you can't define what leadership is to begin with it can make it quite difficult to assess the level of leadership of the person's followers.
Let's look a little closer. If we have a QB mentality the the ball always has to pass through our hands. Every play is dependent upon us and our ability. Every success becomes our success and every failure becomes our failure.
What I am struggling, straining, and striving to move towards is becoming a coach. See a coach knows all the positions. He knows the fundamentals that make people a success at every position, although he himself may never have played the position "professionally". But it's difficult to move from QB to Coach.
For those few people that have made the transition to coach, the hard part is training assistant coaches. For many of us, we make the initial move to coaching our teams, but we fail to ever build a structure that sets us up to coach coaches instead of just players. IF WE ALWAYS COACH PLAYERS WE ARE REALLY JUST QB'ING FROM THE SIDELINE!!! We must establish a structure that allows us to coach other coaches and develop them to coach players.
Of course recognizing that you need to make them coaches and actually making them coaches are two very different things. You can't just warp yourself to success, you have to move from where you are to where you're going... and that is a blog for another day!
Wednesday, July 02, 2008
One year and 57 days later the journey continues
So it has been a long long journey. Wow.
It's amazing how one single event in your life can turn your entire world so upside down that it changes everything about how you act, what you do, and even to some extent who you think you are. Since the last time I posted so many things have changed... but I'm excited to be back.
Change Addicts will be taking on an additional flavor to our mix. New authors will be joining us as well as some new topics. This is going to become a full fledge coaching blog for leaders from around the world. Here you will get practical training in how to be better facilitators, better communicators, and better leaders. It's certainly not that I have all the answers, but in this community there will be voices to help you refine not only your theory but your strategy as you take on every aspect of your individual journey.
You will see lesson plans for coaching children and teenagers, you will hear techniques on how to deal with specific situations and of course you'll have your usual inciting blogs by yours truly! I'm excited... I can't wait to see what kind of community we create this time. I'll introduce you to our new authors as you meet them and I look forward to meeting you as well!
So post your heart out, share your true feelings, and don't hold anything back... let's take a leap and unveil the true revolution that God has called us to!
It's amazing how one single event in your life can turn your entire world so upside down that it changes everything about how you act, what you do, and even to some extent who you think you are. Since the last time I posted so many things have changed... but I'm excited to be back.
Change Addicts will be taking on an additional flavor to our mix. New authors will be joining us as well as some new topics. This is going to become a full fledge coaching blog for leaders from around the world. Here you will get practical training in how to be better facilitators, better communicators, and better leaders. It's certainly not that I have all the answers, but in this community there will be voices to help you refine not only your theory but your strategy as you take on every aspect of your individual journey.
You will see lesson plans for coaching children and teenagers, you will hear techniques on how to deal with specific situations and of course you'll have your usual inciting blogs by yours truly! I'm excited... I can't wait to see what kind of community we create this time. I'll introduce you to our new authors as you meet them and I look forward to meeting you as well!
So post your heart out, share your true feelings, and don't hold anything back... let's take a leap and unveil the true revolution that God has called us to!
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